


Last Session

by hashtagyourshirt



Series: In Session [4]
Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Angst, Choices, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Identity Reveal, Therapy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-07
Updated: 2018-01-07
Packaged: 2019-03-01 17:53:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13300143
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hashtagyourshirt/pseuds/hashtagyourshirt
Summary: Wesley visits Faith in prison to tell her Angelus is back. Faith goes to her last session with Kate.





	Last Session

Faith blinked. Her eyes burned at the corners as she smudged the eyeliner she’d saved up to buy from the commissary on the shoulder of her uniform. 

_ This fucking sucks _ , she thought. 

She was waiting with the same guards in the same kennel-like hallway probably wearing the same handcuffs as she always did every other week. It was time for her session. She knew this would be her last with Kate.  _ Probably ever. How am I gonna pay for therapy when I'm a fugitive?  _ She brushed the thoughts away with a stroke of her hand through her hair.  _ Can't think like that. Cuz, hell, I might be dead.  _

Wesley came to see Faith for the first time since she's been in prison early this morning. She didn't know what to expect, seeing him sitting on the other side of the safety glass. He looked ragged; age written in his eyes. 

_ “We need you.” _

__   
_ “Well, uh, thanks for thinking of me, Wes, but I'm kinda unavailable right now. Maybe you want to check back in a few decades when my parole comes up. Besides,” she took a breath, “I'm doing good work in here.”  _ __   


_ Wesley looked like he was only half listening. He wasn't bored by her, he had tunnel vision of the horrors in LA. Faith could see the white around his eyes. “You need to know—” _

__   
_ “It's Armageddon again. I dig. But Angel will--”  _ __   


_ Wesley cut her off, “Angel's gone, Faith. Angelus is back.” _

_ It took everything in Faith to not just bust through the glass panel separating them. _

_ “Meet me at the northeast gate at 2. Be ready to run.” _

Faith didn't want to hear from Wesley how Angelus had returned. Every possibility broke her heart. 

She knew the last time Angelus had truly come back was when Angel lost his soul. He had one moment of true happiness with Buffy.  _ Buffy,  _ Faith thought,  _ how does she do that? I had what I thought was the beginning of true happiness, but I couldn't touch it; couldn't get too close to her even though it's what I wanted most. Still want.  _

Faith’s number was called over the PA speaker, breaking her out of her thoughts. The guards held her loosely, just above the elbows. Once they reached Kate’s door, they removed Faith’s cuffs. 

Kate burst from the door of her usual office. “Hey, Faith,” she smiled warmly. “Come in when you're ready.” 

Before entering through the door, Faith took a deep breath.  _ Make this good.  Maybe you can look Kate up after all of this.  _ She made sure her eyes were dry and crossed the threshold. The office was dark since there were no windows. One lamp filled the space with warm light; this was a safe haven cocoon for just Faith and Kate. Sitting in her normal seat, Faith swept her eyes over the room saying a silent goodbye. She couldn't bring herself to look at Kate just yet. 

“So,” Kate sat in her chair beaming. “How have things been since I last saw you?” Faith’s red rimmed eyes locked with Kate's hazel ones. 

“Not great,” Faith murmured. She went back to studying the federal-issued carpet. 

Kate wrinkled her brow. Something was going on with Faith. The last time Kate had seen Faith enter a session like this, Buffy had died. Faith simply sat and cried for most of the session. It was hard for Kate to watch such a strong woman be so hurt. It was hard not to reach out and comfort her. 

“I'm sorry to hear that,” she softly replied. “Would you like to talk about it?” 

Faith twisted in her seat.  _ How can I tell her this is goodbye without sounding the alarm? I can't just leave. I can't just let this be the end.  _ Faith inhaled deeply through her nose.  _ I can't have her disappointed in me.  _

Exhaling, Faith thought she might try something new: the whole truth. 

“Yeah, I would like to talk about it.” Faith wiped under her eyes. “This is going to be my last session.” 

“What makes you say that?” Kate asked, taken aback. 

“I have to save the world.” 

Faith words hung like a tightrope between them. Any sudden movements, and one could leave heartbroken. 

Kate took a breath. “What's happened?” She exhaled, her voice full of concern. This was a blow to her as much as Faith. 

“Angel, he, he’s-” Faith shuddered. Tears streamed down her face; cheap eyeliner everywhere. 

Scrubbing her cheeks furiously, she continued, “He’s doing real bad.  He lost,” she second guessed herself, “everything he's worked toward. He's gone from his path.” 

Kate had worked with Faith long enough to know when she was withholding the truth for her own protection. “What does this mean for us?” 

_ Us?  _ Faith had never realized there was an ‘us’ to be had in session with Kate. It made it that much harder to go through with this goodbye. 

“I'm needed. I'm the only one who can help Angel. His people, well, person, called me knowing I would have to fight to get him back.” Faith ran her thumb under each eye, clearing any smears. “I can't lose him.” 

The two women sat with this, neither daring to break the silence. 

“This is very difficult,” Kate’s voice cracked as she spoke. “We've done a lot of good work the past three years. How can we, right now, make sure this is a good relationship end for you?”  _ For us _ , Kate thought. 

A good relationship end. Faith had no idea what that could even look like. She knew she was a part of the way there just showing up. She could've dipped out and disappeared.  _ It's what I do best _ , she thought bitterly.  _ Just peace out, Southie Style.  _ There was something in Faith that pushed her not to do that this time.  _ Kate. It's all her, and me.  _

“I really don't know what to do.” She was trying to be as transparent as she could. Kate deserved it.  Faith deserved it. “I'm not big on goodbyes.  Usually, I just skip town, but with you, you've helped realize I  _ don't  _ want to just keep doing that. I want to keep people in my life.”

A sorrow-ridden look of pride bloomed on Kate’s face. The growth Faith had accomplished from their first session to now was evident. 

“That makes me so happy to hear you say that. I want you to experience what it's like not to have a shitty ending.” Kate’s eyes bore into Faith’s; Faith couldn't help but be mesmerized by those hazel eyes filled with fierce emotion. Emotion for  _ her _ .  “You've worked so hard and have come so far that it would break my heart to have this end badly. Please, Faith,” the tightrope twanged between them, “let's make this right.” 

Faith knew Kate’s pleading was genuine. Suddenly, her mind was clear. The tears slowed, her breath steadied. 

“Kate,” their eyes locked, “I need to tell you the truth.” Both women sat straighter in their chairs. “I'm a vampire slayer. I was chosen, called to service, found really, when I was 16. That's when I met Diana. She was my Watcher and so much more.” 

Now that Faith had started, she couldn't stop. Kate listened patiently, full of acceptance. 

“She was killed by Kakistos. He was a vampire, not a drug dealer like I told you. After that, I went to Sunnydale. That's where I met her.”  _ Buffy.  _ “She's a slayer, too. She's how I met Angel. They were together back then. He's a vampire with a soul.” Faith took a shuddering breath, “but now something happened. I don't know. Wes just told me he lost his soul; he's a monster, and I have to save him.” 

Silence consumed the room. Faith thought she'd made a mistake, sharing so much.  _ Now I know she won't ever believe me. I just ruined any chance of having her in the future by opening my big mouth.  _

Just as Faith was about to stand to leave, to run, Kate broke the silence. 

“I'm so sorry,” she whispered. “Thank you for sharing so much with me, for being so open.” Faith swore she saw a tear tear down Kate's cheek. “It's only fair that I do some of the same.

“I  _ know _ about slayers.” Faith’s eyes widened. “I was once training to be a Watcher. I went to the Watcher Academy at fifteen. At eighteen, I wanted to attend college to widen my field experience.” Kate had wanted to tell the young slayer before her this for months, years, even. “While I was at college, I got interested in psychology. It got me thinking, ‘the Watchers’ Council has  _ nothing  _ like psych benefits for slayers.’ I enquired about that and was shut down, so I left. I made my way trying to bring support for slayers.” She took a deep breath, “and I found you, Faith.” 

Faith’s mouth was dry. She had wanted to share this connection with Kate for so long, but feared it would end up with her therapy privileges revoked.  _ Kate was a Watcher…? What does this mean for us? _

Choosing her words carefully, Faith tried to make sense of this confession. “I had no idea.” She folded her arms. “Did you always know I was a slayer?” 

“No. I put some pieces together: your stories, your background, your connection to Sunnydale. I wasn't planning on telling you about my past just yet, but seeing as this is our last session…” She trailed off lamely, unable to finish the thought. 

Faith relaxed. She unfolded her arms, unclenched her jaw. Drawing a deep breath, she let her eyes dance over the room: over the photo of a sunrise opposite her, over Kate’s desk, always neat, down to her hands in her lap. “I'm going to miss you so much.” Faith’s voice was calm, her mind clear; she looked unblinkingly at Kate, searching for the strength she’d always seen in her hazel eyes. 

“I'm going to miss you too, Faith.  This,” she gestured between them, “is built because of  _ both  _ of us. You've come so far, done so much good, you are  _ going _ to save the world.”

Faith smiled, fresh tears making their way down her face. The tightrope had grown; strong roots protecting her heart stretched steady and new connecting the two women in ways that couldn't be explained. 

Faith nodded slowly, her throat tight. “I hope I do see you again.”  

Kate stood and made her way to Faith. She grasped both of the younger woman’s hands in her own. To Faith’s surprise, tears started to well in Kate’s eyes. “I'm sure our paths will cross again.”

They beamed at each other, eyes bright with emotion. They knew their time was quickly ending, but neither could bring themselves to break the connection; their knuckles pale in each other's hands. 

Finally, painfully wrenching herself from their moment, Faith spoke. “I gotta go, Kate.” She made to pull her hands away, but couldn't. Instead, Kate pulled her into a hug. 

“You've changed  _ me _ , too, Faith.” Kate pulled back far enough to meet Faith’s eyes. “Don’t forget the good work you've done in here.” 

Faith nodded and brushed a stray tear from her face. After squeezing Kate tight one more time, Faith broke their embrace. 

“Thanks, Kate, for everything.” Faith stood and Kate followed. “I promise to look you up when I'm ready for another Watcher.” 

“I hope you do.” 

They stood just looking at each other for a moment, both smiling. Nothing else needed to be said; everything they needed was written in their eyes. 

With that, Faith opened the door and took off down the hallway. She tore through serpentine bunks and out to the open space at the north end of the prison. The guards cries of “Stand down, inmate!” were whispers that rolled off her shoulders. 

She sprinted toward the corner where sunlight pooled on her face before she swan dived through the thick glass in the closed window.  Faith kept her eyes closed as she slowly spun in the light. 

Seconds before she hit the hood of Wesley’s car to rush to LA, Faith had felt free. 


End file.
